A Fly Fisher’s Girlfriend’s Point of View:
How to Get Her Fishing? (Or at least to understand it.)
Let’s face the facts. Most of the eager fly fishers are men. Men who tinker with their flies all night long when given the chance, who spend 50 weeks in a year planning their two week fishing trip and can go on and on about the trout they caught three years ago and about the one they’re hoping to get this year. These men are passioned about their hobby that should actually be called their lifestyle.
Often these men also have wives or girlfriends. They probably love them very dearly and want to make their every dream come true like any good husband or boyfriend would. But sometimes the call of the river gets louder than the nag of the wife and he has to make the choice ofter dreaded: to spend time with your lady or go fishing and get what’s coming to you later.
Of course some of the women are really into fly fishing as well or just don’t mind you spending the time paddling on your float tube. If so, consider yourself one lucky fisherman. For the rest of you, who want to make your woman understand the beauty of fly fishing, here’s a few tips and tricks. Coming straight from one girlfriend who’s been living (and fishing) with a fly fisher for over ten years. And yes, still happily together despite a few blazing rows by some riverbanks.
1. Take her fishing. That’s all? you’re thinking. Sure, sounds simple but it ain’t. You may have already tried but with no luck. Maybe she tells you she’s not interested (”No way, not in a million years!”) or she’s busy doing something else (”I’d rather die than spend a day standing in a freezing cold water!”). And it’s fine if it suits you both.
But if you feel you need to and want to make her see what it’s really all about, she needs to do it all by herself. You might need to make a little sacrifice for it (agree to have dinner with her parents, go shopping next Saturday or attend a spinning class with her for the rest of the year) but it’ll be worth it. Or if not, at least you did your best and she’ll be happy that you actually wanted to share something that’s really important to you with her.
2. Make it comfortable. When going fishing pick a day that’s warm and little sunny. If it rains, is cold or really windy, cancel. No matter what. First time fishing and getting soaking wet or cold is not going to make a good start. Casting in a strong wind is also totally miserable so do what you can to pick a day with nice and easy weather conditions.
3. Choose the best spot for her. This is as important as the weather. When you think about the best fishing spots what comes in mind? A six-hour hike to that one perfect pool in the middle of nowhere? A heavy stream and slippery rocks that make wading really tricky but fishing nice and challenging? Banks full of trees and bushes that catch your hook more often than the fish? Yeah, sounds great!
Seriously, not. A first-timer who’s feeling skeptical about it all from the beginning won’t be able to appreciate your secret and best fishing spots. So pick a place that is beautiful, easy to get in to and easy to cast.
4. Food. Pick a basket and load it with her favorite treats. I know you can go on all day with a single chocolate bar simply because you’re so super excited to be fishing in a first place but she can’t. Trust me.
So go to her favorite bakery and get all the cupcakes and tuna-sandwiches she loves, make a fresh pot of coffee to go and make sure you’ve got plenty of chocolate in your back bag.
5. Something to past the time. If your girlfriend is anything like me she probably don’t want to be fishing all the time. So promote the whole excursion as a lovely picnic and give her a break every now and then. Sitting in the sun, having a cup of coffee and reading a good book makes almost any girl happy so if she want’s to do that for a while, let her. Meanwhile you can go fishing and everybody’s happy!
6. Leave when she’s still smiling. Everybody’s got their breaking point. For some it comes after ten minutes and others after hours. Timing is crucial here. It might seem to you like a time or opportunity lost to leave just after few hours but the best thing to do is to get back to the car when you both are still having fun. That way she might actually understand you better next time you’re going fishing, you might start thinking that she’s the best catch of your life and the rest of your day together will be cosy and harmonious.
I hope this helps you to get started. And remember, you don’t need to do everything together (not even us women want that) but getting to know each other’s interests usually helps you to get to know each other as well. Just don’t take it too seriously. Actually catching a fish is not as important as having fun together.
So tight lines and have fun!
A guest post from one girlfriend who’s been living (and fishing) with a fly fisher for over ten years.